Gestures & Comments

There has been a quote that I read in the book, “Exploring Leadership” that has resonated with me in most of our class discussions thus far.  It was stated that, “We communicate with our physical appearance, personal space, facial expressions, gestures, touching, eye contact, the expression of emotions, and orientation toward time- all of which have cultural components” (Exploring Leadership p169).  In the chapter of Understanding Others I read how little and subtle things like a facial expression can cause so much thought in the mind of the person you are interacting with.  I know from experience, I can tell when someone is annoyed or does not want to listen to anything being said around them.  I can also think back to times when I catch myself saying in my head, “this person doesn’t know what they are talking about, or why are we talking about this, or this is really boring.”  Everyone, I believe, has those subconscious thoughts that they would not say out loud because of the inappropriateness or respect level.  I also have realized though, that through this class, the readings, and especially the activity discussions we have gone through, I can see how little things like body language or attitude can shift the entire outlook and vibe of the group as a whole. 

I think as a leader, or pertaining to becoming a good leader, those subconscious thoughts and attitudes need to sometimes be conquered for the greater good, or if not suppressed, expressed in a correct manor.  Not everyone will agree or like to hear what we all have to say about an issue.  However, expressing a difference in opinion is not the same as ignoring or shooting down another’s.  I believe the take away from this quote and what we have experienced in class so far is that it is definitely good to have your own opinion but there is also a level of respect that is necessary.  Whether in class, with friends, or in the workplace, it is a quality and courtesy in a person to give other views a chance and not be so closed minded when it pertains to thoughts that are opposite our own.  We need to self-monitor in these situations, as a leader and also as a human being, to not do the eye rolling or instant judgment of others.  To add to this topic, I thought another quote that I have heard in class and also in the book was, “One challenge, then, is to understand yourself well enough to know how you are seen by others and to modify your own behaviors and attitudes to encourage a spirit of openness and connection with others” (Exploring Leadership p153).  I feel that from the discussions in class, we have expressed this thought that implies an effect on our own motivation and self-esteem when others have a certain body language or attitude toward a topic.  I think that knowing myself better and also understanding my weaknesses as a person will help me see the person that everyone else sees.  Furthermore, then I can start to understand how I may come off abrasive, or timid, or overpowering, or even disconnected to some.  I look at this topic as a “work in progress” stage and trying to understand myself will help me in the long run.